Healthy Diet

[emilygracemom]

Our whole family is seeing a Nutrionist/Chiropractor and she is really good. She has recommended that our whole family change our eating habits to the Mediterrean Diet, mostly protein, eggs, legumes, whole wheat, rice, fish, meat, chicken, LOTS of vegetables, healthy fats, small amounts of fruit and NO sugar period. I am sure that the eating plan is healthy, but is it realistic? What if your child doesn't want to eat it? She will eat some things, but CRAVES sugar and fruit. Our nutrionist had us write down her eating for a week and said that it was WAY to many carbs/ sugar and that her blood sugar is up and down hence all the hyperactivity.

I do believe that diet is important. How do you balance it all with BC? I am not sure if it is realistic to NEVER have treats. Has anyone else struggled with this balance? I have noticed that sugar does effect her behavior along with other things.

I don't want this family diet to effect our relationship or add to our stress as we are just starting BC, but I also want us to eat healthy. I just bought Nourishing Traditions Cookbook and it seems more balanced overall.

Any thoughts?

Blessings,
Beth

[rstump]

For me personally...I crave sugar when I am lacking B-vitamins and when I am lack FAT. If I increase my fats...up to 40-55% than my sugar cravings virtually disappear. We follow a NT/WAPF traditional foods diet. Our family has never been healthier.

[Rebecca]

Hi Beth,
This is one I personally have a lot of experience with.

I just took my 4 year old off of all sugars, including most fruit. He was eating the same things your daughter is eating... way too many refined carbs. His behavior was up and down- irratic. I knew I needed to do something. I also had to do the same with my older son because he had food allergies. It is absolutely possible and I would also say that it was a very good lesson for me and for them about how to handle setting limits.

The first step was for me to make the decision that we needed to do this. Then, I had to get my husband's agreement. After that, I went out and got lots of food that he could eat and got rid of the food he couldn't. (At least I put it away and out of sight and ate those things when he was sleeping for a while to avoid any battles.) I talked to him about what was going to happen and assured him that there would be plenty of yummy foods that he would be able to eat (and I made sure that it was true). I told him that he might miss some of the foods, but that he would start feeling better (and I pointed out those times when he wasn't feeling well to help him understand what I was talking about). I also told him that I would be eating the food with him, so he wouldn't have to do it by himself. (This was true during the day to start with, so I did truly understand what it felt like to give up the foods I was used to.)

What I found is that children are very resilient. Yes, there were some days with temper tantrums. I would listen and validate his feelings- yes, it is hard and I know you want _____ . But I would hold firm to my decision and usually within a few minutes, he would eat what I offered. Sometimes not. Sometimes it took much longer. But he was learning that there really were limits, but that he could still have his feelings about it. I would listen and understand the best I could. But he still couldn't have ____ .

Once he understood that I really was serious about this, it wasn't so hard when we went out in public. I always made sure that I had foods that were on his diet that he liked and could eat that were somewhat special when we were out and about. He learned that this was just the way it was and that there were times I was going to say no and I meant it.

Nourishing Tradition has lots of treats that are much healthier. When her body normalizes some, she'll be able to have those without a problem.

Even though you're new to BC, I think that setting limits is healthy and part of BC, as long as you can handle her feelings about it. If you would struggle with this at this point, just start transitioning more healthy foods into your diet, whether she eats them or not. Modeling is a huge part of it. Slowly, stop buying the less healthy foods and trading out healthier versions. For example, buy brown rice (if that's on her diet) and start mixing it in with the white rice. Or instead of white flour tortillas, try some other whole grain tortillas (like sprouted tortillas- either corn or whole wheat). Don't be afraid to set limits with her, even if you only start with some of the small things (like no more candy). Just expect her to be upset about it. The first thing is usually the hardest (mostly for you), but then they learn that they are going to be validated for their feelings and they will be okay.

Another thing we did is to start adding in more protein (and fat) any time we could get him to eat it. (A glass of raw milk, some raw cheese, almond butter, etc.) This helped to stabilize blood sugar so that he was less likely to go into an all out tantrum when I set a limit about another food. There were times when he didn't eat for a little while, but it was usually short lived.

Go slowly. Ask questions if you have them. I know many others have also traveled this road.

Yesterday, my son went over to spend some time with a friend. He is 4. He got hungry and the mom got out some snacks. He asked if it had any sugar. When she said, "yes" he said he couldn't eat it. He kept asking until she found a no-sugar snack- popcorn. Hurray for him!

Yes, it is possible...

[emilygracemom]

Thanks for the replies about healthy eating. The struggle that I have now is when we have to eat outside the house. Church seems to be the worst culprit right now with red juice box (supposedly 100% juice but it has
natural flavors and I KNOW what that means) and cheese puffs for the kids snack! YIKES! I HATE that my daughter feels different and my husband and I have struggled with letting her have the snack at church so that she can have what the other kids are eating once a week.

I feel good about our whole family eating traditional foods and I know that is the right thing for our family, but my main struggle is how to handle birthday parties, church and so forth (basically events outside the home that serve food). Do I allow her the treat once in a while? That is what we are struggling with right now.

This is more my struggle because I don't want her to feel different and left out. How do I work through that?

[Rebecca]

I just wanted to share something that I just found. Church is a particularly difficult place, especially with the juice boxes. One of my friends showed me these Water-Roos drinks that come in the juice box container. They are water with a slight juice flavor. No artificial colors. No sugar. No sweetener of any kind. But my son can drink his juice box like everyone else without the side effect of the dyes and sugar.

Some families handle the snack part by volunteering to bring in the snack for the class. Then, go to the health food store (or find a co-op) and still take in cheetos, but the one without MSG. It is a compromise to the diet, but it isn't as bad as the alternatives. I just wanted to throw that out.

To answer your question about how do you work through that fear of her being left out... when did you feel different or left out as a child? Allow yourself to bring up those experiences and feel those feelings. You might need to cry or be angry about it. Allow it. Even better if you have someone you can share the experiences with who can hear your feelings about it. Then, release the experience and your feelings.

Your daughter will be able to handle the limitations in public if she feels that you are fine with it. If she feels your discomfort about it, she will become self-conscious. After you have felt your own feelings, remind yourself that she is taking good care of herself and you are taking good care of her in this situation. Congratulate yourself! Many parents don't notice when their child is eating something that causes them problems and then blame the child (I don't know why he's acting this way...). Even if you do decide to let her cheat sometimes (totally needs to be your decision), you are aware and making conscious decisions about what will work best for your family. Good for you!

Let us know how it is going and what you decide works best for you!

[kmjjer2911]

Hi!

How did you all get started with special diets for your children/family? We eat fairly healthy foods. I do not buy pre-packaged or prepared foods. I cook with fresh vegetables, fresh fruit and fresh meat (but not a lot of meat- mostly chicken or fish.)

My son (8) has given up most meats this year, which is fine with me and I have finally convinced my husband that it is okay! However, as his anxiety has increased over the past two years, his selectiveness of foods has narrowed! (Isn't that a nice way of saying picky?) He will eat all fruits almost, salad, asparagus, a few carrots, cucumber, tomatoe. He will tolerate/force himself to eat green beans and broccoli as I have told him since he does not have to eat meat, he really needs to eat his veggies now. He will drink some milk, eat cheese and yogurt and peanut butter.

My children will not eat black beans, pinto beans, lentils, or that type of bean which does provide protein.

My children never drink sodas, and not much juice, mainly they drink water and some milk. We don't keep candy in the house. Their dessert is usually ice cream or home-made brownies or cookies.

So can you all steer me to a good website or book for foods/recipes I can sever to the whole family and especially to our son?

I have not eliminated all MSG and other preservatives yet. I am sure those things appear in their: granola bars, chips, goldfish, mini wheats cereal, pretzels. I have not looked yet. The only "packaged" foods I buy are the above. But I am sure I need to check their: bread, flour tortillas, yogurt, etc.

When they go back to school, I hope to have a few hours of free time so we can move to a totally preservative-free diet.

Would any of you be able to post a sample daily diet on the forum? i.e. breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks?

We are all now taking daily vitamins. I need to get fish oil capsules for the children as they hated the Coromega pudding and the Omegabrite children's liquid. My dh and I are finishing those up! My husband calls the pudding his daily brain food!

Thanks,
Kathy

[Rebecca]

is often the hardest part, though it sounds like you've got a handle on many of the basics. Just from what you've said here, I'd suggest switching over your few packaged foods to the health food versions of those. This will eliminate MSG, hydrogenated oils, etc.

There are lots of great books out there. One I've used a lot is Feeding the Whole Family by Cynthia Lair- http://www.feedingfamily.com/
She has a lot of vegetarian family-friendly recipes, as well as foods that can be used as side dishes.

I also use Nourishing Traditions, which is full of more traditional recipes. Not all of them are kid friendly, but I have enjoyed expanding my knowledge and recipes by using that book, as well.

Make sure that your vitamins are whole food based. I like Juice Plus, but they tend to be a bit more expensive. If you go to a health food store, ask for whole food vitamins and they can show you your options.

I'll try to post sample menus for us in a little while...

[kmjjer2911]

:popcorn

Yes, we used to use Juice Plus about 6 years ago for a year right after coming home from Russia with Roman. One of the couples on our trip sold it and sold it to us at cost. It did get too expensive.

I'll check their vitamins.

I am taking a Vitamin B supplement which seems to be giving me lots more energy - should all of ours be "whole food" vitamins?

Thanks for the info - will look into it soon!

K

[Rebecca]

My understanding, after speaking with my friend, Rose Forbes, who is a clinical nutritionist, is that vitamins based in whole foods are going to have the micronutrients to help assimilate everything, while synthetic vitamins are isolated in a way not found in nature. You may notice a temporary difference, but over the long term, you may find you have much better luck with supplements based in whole foods. You are going to get more bang for your buck, though she pointed out that the best thing is to get your nutrients from food itself, as it is perfectly packaged to give your body what it needs in the right combinations. For B vitamins, you might find juicing ala Dr. Mercola would be helpful, which means juicing green leafy vegetables (along with other vegetable combinations). My B vitamins were very low and that increased it dramatically over a short period of time. But, every body is different, so figure out what is going to work best for you right now. Sometimes supplements are the best intervention short term.

Let us know what you decide. I'm interested to hear what you find (and am sure others will be, too!).

[kmjjer2911]

I am familiar with Dr. Mercola's website. I found out about it from Kaitlin's 4th grade teacher last year who is a vegan. He mostly eats raw fruits, veggies, and juices tons of fruits and veggies. He was a brand new teacher to our school last year, very young, just moved from New York. He started the first school garden with her 4th grade class.

I have not tried juicing yet - I don't have a juicer yet.

This will be a big goal for me once the children go back to school. TO figure out how to incorporate more whole foods into our daily diet.

After talking to Kaitlin's teacher, I felt much better about Roman choosing not to eat meat. However, I need to get more green veggies and hearty beans into him. That is where I need the most help - getting Roman introduced to and enjoying veggies.

I need to come up with some really healthy foods and snacks that they will eat every day. But I think that means I will have to never have granola bars and cheese sticks in the house.

Thanks and whoever can keep sharing information, please do!

Kathy

[greenbeanbanshee]

I have really been enjoying this thread. I think we need to have a nutrition course next, Rebecca! Because so many of want to do what is right, but we just don't have the blue print/education to make it happen.

Last night we were all so tired from getting back from camping that we all went to bed early. Tyler stayed up a little later, doing who knows what (which is so cool that he can now do that!!!). Anyway, I didn't make a real dinner. Me and Ethan and Sierra ate a huge bowl of salad in bed, which was good enough for me. And this morning I woke up, cooked potatoes and eggs (for my dad), while listening to him complain that we didn't "really eat" last night. Finally I asked Tyler what he had for dinner and he told us "carrots". My dad just about flipped his lid. He literally used the words "child abuse". I'm not even kidding! I must have passed out laughing by this point, realizing just how far I've come in my parenting journey from where my parents started me out.

I just think that's so hilarious. Sad, but hilarious. Tyler tried to convince him that he prefers vegetables over big dinners anyway, but I swear, my dad thought he was lying to save me.

Anyway, yes, a class on nutrition would be highly recommended. I don't know about anybody else, but I'd take it for sure.

~Bethany

[emilygracemom]

I would LOVE a nutrition class class too! It is so hard to know what to feed your family sometimes. Emily has tummy issues and so that makes things even harder. Right now we are on a protein and vegetable diet to get her tummy feeling better along with whole food supplements. We can add some more stuff back in when her tummy settles a bit.

I have been cooking some yummy things out of the Nourishing Traditions cookbook and I LOVE that cookbook! Some things I have to modify for Emily, but I have enjoyed the good info in there.

[kmjjer2911]

Bethany,
I had to laugh at your father's response to your salad and carrot dinner! Personally, I think that was awesome! I was laughing because my husband is so used to meat, starch, veggie, fruit and dessert for dinner every night. He is very okay with leftovers but he NEEDS to have something from each of those catagories on his plate or it is not "a real meal." Well, that was until one year ago, and we were starting to go through with so much trauma with our son and out of necessity my husband's NEEDS turned into gratefulness for whatever was on the dinner table!!

Now, my husband has gotten used to a meal that is say salad and potatoes. Or a summer dinner of tomatoes, cucumbers, corn, salad and bread. Or on many a traumatic night: cold cereal with orange juice, or pancakes and organic saussage, or eggs scrambled with veggies and cheese!

I will confess that our son's aggression and rages were so bad this summer that I requested one dinner a week from the women's church group! So every Wednesday this summer, one of the ladies has delivered a full meal and that has made my husband sooooooo happy!!! Unfortunately, the meals end in two weeks as I told the pastor that when the children return to school, I can hopefully do all our meals. But honestly, things were so traumatic, we could not leave our children in the same room together for fear of aggression where someone would get seriously hurt.

We have come a long way in 3 weeks with our son's aggression down to almost nothing now. I posted about it on Heather's yahoo group. Thanks to BCLC and CP, our whole family is doing much better. So that is why I anticipate having more time to devote to healthy eating and living in two weeks! However, transition to school and school itself could bring major dysregulation so we'll see what happens and if our son's summer healing will help him have more enjoyable and peaceful times at school.

P.S. What brand or company do you all use for your "whole food" supplements? And I have to take my vitamin B at 10 pm. to avoid stomach upset during the day but guess what? The vitamin B is giving me such an energy boost from 10 p.m. to 2 a.m. - I can't fall asleep so I sit here and type to you all!! Guess I better quit this vitamin B and find a whole food substitute!! But in case any of you need to stay up all night, mega Vit B is better than coke and coffee- wow it would have worked a lot better than caffeine in my college days!!

Kathy