Consciously Parenting as a Christian?

[mykdsmomy]

(sorry for all the threads I've started.) :o

This is something that has been on my mind. Most of my Christian friends think that consequences, training and (some) spanking is biblical.

I have one friend who doesnt necessarily think spanking is biblical but she does think that children need consequences to their actions...ie: time outs, priveleges taken away, etc.

Are there biblical references to back up "consciously parenting"? I want to be able to discuss this with my friends. I would also love to see this type of parenting implemented in our church where to my knowledge, "Growing Kids God's way" is still used :mad:

I'm just trying to figure out how to go about advocating this method from a Christian perspective? Thanks :love

[Rebecca]

No worries about more threads. That's why you have access to that button!

Here is an article written by Heather Forbes on this topic. It comes up a lot! She uses the same paradigm, so everything she is saying in this article applies to love-based consciously parenting.

You may need to sign in to access this link... I'm not sure.

http://www.beyondconsequences.com/enewsletter/issue20.html

Hope this helps!

[Lianne]

I am a Christian and have encountered this as well. One of my favorite responses to the argument of spanking is that, reading the stories of Jesus and the children, I do not think he would have ever hit them.

I want to read the article Rebecca posted and will probably be back with more comments :D

[mykdsmomy]

Thank you both for the responses :) I've always thought that Jesus would never advocate spanking too but the one passage in the bible that always comes up when I mention not spanking is the "spare the rod, spoil the child". What would you all say to that? (just trying to get some good feedback to explain to people who think the bible "commands" them to spank their children) :rolleyes:

[rstump]

Thank you both for the responses :) I've always thought that Jesus would never advocate spanking too but the one passage in the bible that always comes up when I mention not spanking is the "spare the rod, spoil the child". What would you all say to that? (just trying to get some good feedback to explain to people who think the bible "commands" them to spank their children) :rolleyes:

It is best to research that verse for yourself and to understand that the ROD....is to guide....not to hit.

Here is an article specific to the idea of the "rod".

http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/articles/rodstudy.php

This website has lots of great articles. It is a good site for Christian mothers. They are still some what punitive certainly not Consciously Parenting but they are better than most "Christian" parenting sites.

[mykdsmomy]

It is best to research that verse for yourself and to understand that the ROD....is to guide....not to hit.

Here is an article specific to the idea of the "rod".

http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/articles/rodstudy.php

This website has lots of great articles. It is a good site for Christian mothers. They are still some what punitive certainly not Consciously Parenting but they are better than most "Christian" parenting sites.

I remember you from the other boards :D Yep, I know the rod verse is to guide...(as a shepherd guides his sheep). It's hard to get people to agree with that though.
I've almost learned to "gauge" a person's willingness to hear another perspective. Some of the people I've discussed this with wholeheartedly believe in "training" their children. You are absolutely right that I need to really research this more (from a biblical perspective) so I can feel more comfortable when talking to people and trying to explain consciously parenting :)

[Rebecca]

Thank you both for the responses :) I've always thought that Jesus would never advocate spanking too but the one passage in the bible that always comes up when I mention not spanking is the "spare the rod, spoil the child". What would you all say to that? (just trying to get some good feedback to explain to people who think the bible "commands" them to spank their children) :rolleyes:

I heard Dr. Post respond to this question once. He is a Christian. He says that anyone who uses that verse to justify hitting children knows nothing about sheep. (That alone really cracks me up.) If you hit a sheep over the head or on the backside with a rod, he isn't going to listen to anything you say to him. The rod is used to GUIDE the sheep, not to hit them. Sheep need guidance, just as children do. Without guidance, a child will be "spoiled;" NOT without being hit, a child will be "spoiled."

I have a permanent image of someone hitting a sheep with a rod trying to get them to do what they want and the sheep just staring at them, then perhaps charging. That's what I always think about with when I hear that bible verse come up.